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Sunday, July 24, 2011
So in the early 1400s I decided to commission the building of a trans-Antarctic superhighway, which took about 150 years to complete. Since there is very little ocean in my world and a lot of closed borders (folks that won't let you pass through their lands), I thought it would be more convenient to have a sweet road that went below everybody, so I could pop up for the occasional surprise attack.
Not only have my adversaries used the road several times against me, but those damn barbarians keep building cities in the middle of my road. They must be drawn to the organization and reflective heat of the pavement or something, but they are a nuisance cause they've killed dozens of my workers who just happened to see their archers too late. A moment of silence please, for the fallen Sumerian construction contractors who gave their lives to create such beauty.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
You guys would sure like this fine film, if per chance you hadn't seen it... Oh man, its got some cinematography that will blow your mind, and make you laugh really hard. There's no way you won't.
Spoiler alert: One of my favorite scene is when some vatos are trying to challenge him to a race in East L.A. and he just says no I'm looking for directions, and then all the sudden out of nowhere he just goes flying through the windshield in slow motion, and only do we learn after a 30-second pan that its because he hit a concrete center divider. He just wasn't paying attention! That never happens in action movies, it was great.
Then there's a million other parts that are awesome, shocking (literally), and kind of disturbing. In a good way.
I also just saw The Mechanic, a pretty quality film, but you need to see this film first if you haven't.
Tuesday, July 05, 2011
Fred Durst, of the comedy music duo Limp Bizkit, died in his sleep at home last Sunday, when a large spacecraft unexpectedly plowed into his Beverly Hills Adjacent condominium. It was later established that the accident was the result of a hyperdrive miscalculation by the pilot of the craft, one Lando Calrissian, who mistakenly forgot to take into account Earth when planning his rout from a galaxy far, far away, to Calvin's Jeri Curl Outlet in Mos Eislies Spaceport. Mr. Calrissian, who had a prior warrant for a similar incident, tried to flee the scene but was later caught and arrested.
For bereavement enthusiasts and well-wishers, the Durst family is accepting cans of tuna and and dog biscuits as a donation to starving cats in Afghanistan, as was specified in Freddy's silly will.
Friday, July 01, 2011
I used to be anti-Steam, because I don't like loader/launcher apps nor any shit that runs in the background. However, I'm finally coming around to the size that is Steam. There are some sweat download deals on there. Last night I obtained Team Fortress 2 for free and also picked up Borderlands GoTY edition for $7.50. I'm now cursing myself for buying Oblivion GoTY on XBOX for $24, because it was available last night on Steam for $6, and it would run so much hotter on my PC. I almost want to blow my wad on it, because it costs less than some sandwiches. I've procured a USB wireless receiver for my PC so I can use my XBOX 360 wireless controller for PC gaming while I pipe my ATI video card output right up the digital cornhole into my 1080p HDTV. It's fucking tight how crisp it looks. Work day must end soon so that I can play with my new toys.
Heated by Huge Larry at 10:19 AM